


Cat!Spy Short

by nells_is_trying_to_write



Category: Team Fortress 2
Genre: Cat Ears, Cat!Spy, Gen, M/M, Respawn, respawn malfunction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-16
Updated: 2019-08-16
Packaged: 2020-09-01 22:56:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,862
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20265859
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nells_is_trying_to_write/pseuds/nells_is_trying_to_write
Summary: Thanks to a respawn accident, Spy gets a new look





	Cat!Spy Short

**Author's Note:**

> Realized I never posted this on here, so here you go. You’re welcome ;)

Something brushed against Spy’s leg, and he twitched violently, only his deeply ingrained training keeping him from letting out a startled yelp.

He glared down at the cat twining itself around his ankles. “Are you _trying _to get shot?!” he hissed. “Go bother Pyro, they actually like you.”

The cat blinked up at him, smugly unimpressed. Spy rolled his eyes and peered back around the doorframe of the building he’d taken shelter in. There was a thunder of mini-gun fire from over by the water tower, and a scream from one of the scouts. He didn’t really care which one.

The cat meowed, batting at his pant leg. He shook it off with a frown. “Stop that.” Not happy at being ignored, it meowed again, louder. _“Shush!”_

There was a distant explosion, and then the other team’s Soldier landed in the open area between the buildings, rocket launcher smoking. 

Spy stepped back, a hand on his watch.

_“Eeeyowww!!”_

The cat let out a howl, yanking it’s paw out from under his heel. Spy froze, then winced as the helmeted head turned in his direction. He slammed the invisibility button on his watch, but it was too late. A rocket screamed, there was a brief moment of blinding pain, and then everything went black.

____________________________ 

_“You failed.”_

The BLU team headed for the locker room, grumbling. They’d lost miserably, and the humiliation round had been equally horrible.

“This sucks!” Scout complained, throwing himself down on the bench. He yanked off his headset and crossed his arms, lower lip jutted out.

“I agree!” Soldier bellowed. “That was TERRIBLE! And where was that _double-crossing frog?!_ He was supposed to keep that RED hack OCCUPIED!”

Demo frowned and glanced around. “That’s a good point, actually. Has anyone seen Spy since the start of the match?”

Everyone looked at each other, then around the room. It wasn’t unusual for Spy to disappear after a match, but he’d failed to follow the battle plan for the day, and he hadn’t even stopped by his locker afterwards. Sniper shook his head. “I usually spot him at least a couple times a round, an’ I only saw him once at the very start.”

Heavy opened his mouth, but was cut off by a mechanical wail. Everyone looked over at Engineer, who unhooked a yellow device from his belt and frowned at it. He prodded a few buttons, then tapped the screen. “Respawns goin’ off.”

The machine let out another wail, screen flashing, and he paled before turning and running out of the room, a hand on his helmet.

The team exchanged worried glances, then hurried after him. Respawn was something that concerned them all.

Scout got there first, and skidded to a stop in the doorway as the others piled up behind him.

Engineer was hunched over the Respawn log, the machine itself humming and flashing worriedly. "Says Spah died an hour into the match and hasn't respawned yet.” He pushed his helmet out of the way and scratched his head, brow furrowed. “And it says somethin’ else died with him. Doc, come look at this.”

Medic started forward, but the machine began screeching and shaking, lights flashing and sensors beeping. Engie fell over and Medic back-peddled hurriedly; Heavy grabbed the doctor’s arm and pulled him back behind the door.

Engineer scrambled to his feet and held up his hands in a placating manner. "Now, now," he said to the machine in a soothing tone. "Calm down girl, c’mon-"

_Crack. BOOM!_

There was an explosion of white light, and Engie was flung backward into Scout and Soldier, the only ones who’d been stupid enough to stay standing in the doorway.

Abruptly, the sounds cut off and the lights faded. Ears ringing, the team lifted their heads, and as one, cautiously peered around the doorway.

Spy was crouched in the middle of the room, eyes wide and suit rumpled. A fluffy black tail stuck out of the back of his pants, and two twitching ears made uncomfortable looking lumps underneath his mask. A set of whiskers poked out of his cheeks.

The team stared.

Spy stared back at them, then straightened, tail quirked.

“Mmphy!” Pyro clapped their hands in delight and hurried excitedly into the room. The rest of the team followed. Medic and Engineer headed straight for the respawn machine, while the others crowded around their unusually silent team mate.

Demo studied Spy's face, grinning. "He's part cat! Ah, looks like a spell gone wrong. Seen Merasmus lately, Sol?"

Soldier shook his head. "Negatory, Sergeant. He is still recovering from the last ass-kicking I gave him!"

Scout reached out to touch Spy's tail, and the older man whipped it away from him, frowning. "Dude, what the fuck happened? Did the RED medic get ahold a ya?"

"I don't think so,” Medic said, peering at the Respawn log. "From the looks of this, Spy got blown up with a cat."

"Whoa, they're usin’ _cats_ as weapons now?! I mean, I always knew they were crazy, but _still_."

Medic rolled his eyes. "No, you idiot. Spy got blown up by a rocket. The cat got blown up along with him."

"Oh, yeah, okay.” Scout scratched his chin. “Probably the one Pyros been feeding. I think it snuck in under the fence."

Spy, meanwhile, had grown weary of the scrutiny and was wandering around the room. His ears twitched under the rumpled mask, and, irritated, he made to pull it off. Sniper lunged forward to stop him. "Whoa there, spook.” He grabbed the other man’s wrists and Spy glared at him and tried to yank his hands free.

“Aww, c’mon, why’d ya stop him,” Scout complained. “I wanna see what he looks like!”

“Because–ow, stop that yah little bugger–because if we let him take his mask off like this, he’ll either make our lives hell once he gets back to normal, or transfer. And then we’ll have to deal with a whole new spy.” He scowled at said spy, who apparently had acquired claws along with whiskers. "Knock it off, you. I'll cut yah some ear holes if you behave. Hey, Truckie, yah got a marker?” 

Engineer rummaged in his overall pocket and tossed a sharpie over his shoulder without looking up from where he and Medic were poking at Respawn.

“Bring him by the lab when you’re done,” Medic called over his shoulder. “I want to run some tests.” 

Still holding one of Spy’s wrists, Sniper dragged him out of the room, stopping by the supply closet to grab some scissors. They stopped outside of Spy’s room, and Sniper let go to fish awkwardly inside the other man’s jacket for his keycard. Not happy with being manhandled, Spy swiped at him. With a sigh, Sniper unlocked the door, hauled Spy into the room, and shut and locked it behind them. Spy glared at him, tail twitching irritably. 

Ignoring the glare and barely sparing a glance for the room itself, Sniper pulled out a chair. "Alright, sit." 

Spy pointedly ignored him, clambering up onto the bed.

Sniper sighed. "Good enough, I suppose. Now hold still." He carefully reached out a hand and gently felt for his new ears under the mask. "Poor lil’ cat-spook. That can't be comfortable." He uncapped the marker and traced two circles around the shape of the trapped ears, then stepped back. "Uh, okay, I'm gonna need ya tah take yer mask off now. I won't look, I promise. I just need tah cut some ear holes and then I'll give it back.” 

Spy blinked at him. 

Sniper grimaced and stepped forward again, one hand over his eyes and the other reaching for Spy's mask. He tugged it off, then quickly turned around and started cutting holes, following his marker lines. He could hear Spy shuffling behind him, investigating the bed and making a strange sort of rumbly humming noise. No, he realized, purring. Spy was purring. He just barely resisted the urge to turn around, and instead concentrated on finishing cutting up the mask. Spy would be mad enough when he got back, no need to make it worse. 

"Alright, spook," he said, holding in out behind his back. "Try this on." Spy didn’ttake it. He wiggled it around a bit. Nothing. Sniper sighed. "Alright, fine. You just, hold still or whatever, and I'll look at the ceiling. Yah better thank me for this later.” 

Eyes up, he turned around and stumbled towards the bed, cautiously feeling around for Spy's head. He caught a skinny shoulder, and patted the air around it until he encountered hair. It was soft, and longer than he expected. He fumbled with the mask for a moment, then shoved it down over the other man’s head. Spy yowled and clawed at him as he tugged his ears through the holes. "Stop that yah little wanker! I'm– ouch– helping you!" He gave a final tug, then stepped back and looked down. 

Spy looked extremely annoyed and the mask was crooked, but two fluffy black ears poked out of the top. Sniper chuckled and reached out to straighten the eye hole, but Spy swiped at him, teeth bared and ears flat against his head. Sniper let out a sigh. 

"Alright, spook. Since you're acting like a cat, I'm gonna treat yah like a cat. No idea if you can hear me right now, but if you can, this is all yer fault." He held out a hand, fingers curled. Spy looked at him, then leaned foreward to sniff, whiskers twitching. After a full minute of careful scrutiny, he turned his cheek toward Sniper in a manner that suggested he was merely turning his head, and definitely wasn’t asking to be petted. Sniper laughed softly and stroked his cheek with two fingers. “Ah, yer gonna be pissed when we get yah back.” Spy blinked slowly at him, and lowered his head so he could get at his ears.

Sniper gently adjusted the mask, then scratched behind his new appendages, smoothing the strands of human hair that stuck out of the hastily cut holes. “Alright. Let’s get yah to Medic. Shouldn’t take too long.” 

____________________________

An hour and forty-five minutes later, Sniper slumped down in a lawn chair outside his camper, panting. It had takes  ages to get Spy down to the lab, he didn’t like being led and wanted to explore the base with his new senses. And once they finally got there, Cat-Spy turned out to be a worse patient that Human-Spy. At least Human-Spy understood what they were saying. 

But they’d called Heavy in, and between the three of them, they managed to get the samples Medic needed. Sniper had handed Spy off to Demo and headed to his camper for a well-deserved nap.

He stretched out, crossing his ankles over each other and folding his hands behind his head. He tilted his hat over his face and closed his eyes. What a day. First Pyro burning the pancakes again, then that hellish match, and then a teammate fusing with a stray cat. He was drifting off when something touched his leg. He groaned and tipped his hat back up. 

_”What?”_


End file.
